i think ive just purchased something crap  

I don't mean to deviate the...
I don't mean to deviate the conversation.
I would cancel the transaction peacefully if at all possible.

Seller
The seller should be able to get their ending fees back. You should be able to get their phone number through Ebay, try talking on the phone.

ebay rules
You can mutually withdraw an ebay sale if you both agree. No fees will be charged the seller. Their only liability is the fee to relist the item at most a few dollars. Tell them you've decided this table won't work in your house. You are soory but can we withdraw the sale? No harm no foul. Offer to pay for relisting.

not going to happen
I have asked and she has said no - offered her money to relist etc.. She wants me to continue with the sale. I did think of just saying no I dont want it and Im sorry, but Im not going to collect it or pay for it, but unfortunately its not really in my nature and I would feel bad about it. So I will collect and resell. Not that Im a seller, usually only list things for friends which I am currently doing for my friend George.

Thurrball - We all make...
Thurball - We all make mistakes (especially on ebay!) as it can be tempting to buy something on impulse (I usually do after a couple of beers at some ungodly hour). However, coming from a personal point of view, so please don't take this the wrong way, I would be pretty annoyed if someone bought something from me then changed their mind. I think the best thing to do is go through with the deal and re sell - I'm sure someone will buy it so all will end well! Good luck, house looks nice btw.

It ain't so bad
At least you aren't in limbo! I victoriously got a danish chair off ebay at a low but fair price... needs complete reupholstering. Was shipped almost 2 weeks ago via Greyhound and haven't gotten it since... was a birthday prez too. I got the sunken heart now. Contacted a nice lady at the shippers Greyhound location, she's looking for it. We'll see...my gut tells me someone pilfered it. Damn it sucks!
If worse comes to worse, I'll post a pic in case someone tries to sell it off somewhere.
Compared to impluse buys...ain't so bad
Just as long as it's a lesson learned. I did a similar buy myself, a rare soul record but the wrong song on the B-side. Didn't find out until after I bought the item. Seller was understanding and voided the transaction. Sounds like you'll recoop most of your moeny if you resell.

its not too bad
i dont want to add insult to injury but i picked up an almost identical table from a skip today. its a bit more battered but essentially the same. however i do like it and if it turns out to fit it could be really good.

.
Not letting you off shows she knows/does not think its an easy sell.Here in most states you have a grace period to return any item by law for any reason there are some exceptions but furniture is not one of them.She is not losing anything,you are.I have bought furniture on ebay for a great price, they never collect the money, sale over nothing done...

.
The more I think about it giving her 25.00 dollars via pay pal is fine.Then forget it.I will say one thing its usually women that take a hard ass/(arse in your country) line on ebay transactions, rarely men in my dealings.I notice her ONE not too clear picture could bypass many sins as well as her scant description...what if its NOT in so good a condition?

Seller
I've sold lots of items on Ebay and have had a few non-payers, didn't really bother me much. It's OK to make mistakes, you should try harder to cancel the transaction. It's not like your ripping her off, she still has the table and your willing to pay a few dollars for the trouble.

The table's a horror so take...
The table's a horror so take the neg feedback and the ebay slap on the wrist on the chin just so long as you don't have that albatross around your neck(hows that for mixed metaphors!?). By all means give the seller her fees and a bit of compensation tho.

Buy it Now
I think it would be different if you were the winner of a spirited bidding war, where loosing bidders might also have second thoughts. But with the Buy it Now the seller is out nothing more than the relisting fee if any (relisting fees are often waived by eBay if a relisted item item sells). I think you should state unequivocally that you've realized this is the wrong table for you and you do not plan on paying for it but are open to some reasonable recompense for the sellers trouble. Be obsequious and apologetic but be firm that you are not going to buy the table. I buy/sell a lot of shit on ebay and it happens on all the time. The seller will get over it.

I dunno...I've done this, my...
I dunno...I've done this, my mom's done this...we just shrugged it off and resold what we'd bought. My mom got a great deal on a really nice pitching wedge. Got it in the mail and it was for a left-handed golfer. 🙂
I once bought a vintage sax thinking I was getting a steal, only to find out it was a "high pitch" horn, meaning it is impossible to play in tune with modern instruments. Traded it to a guy who had a thing for silver saxes for a bedraggled-looking, but usable sax. I ended up selling it for 2 times what I paid for the high pitch sax.
Be a grown-up about it and take your lumps. You'll get most of your money back, if even on Craigslist.
Of course, a sax and a golf club is easier to hide than a full dining set. 😉
fm

I once bought a vintage sax...
I once bought a vintage sax thinking I was getting a steal, only to find out it was a "high pitch" horn, meaning it is impossible to play in tune with modern instruments
lol thats brilliant!! 🙂

In Japan, they have a...
In Japan, they have a saying..."Saru mo ki kara ochiru" (Even monkeys fall out of trees). That was a hard landing, but a great recovery. You can bet I've never made *that* mistake again.
fm